Bark + Bite

Madonna rocks the halftime show at the Super Bowl

Madonna may be one old dog, but she's definitely picked up plenty of new tricks.

The 53-year-old pop diva performed at the Super Bowl XLVI halftime show in Indianapolis in an eye-popping spectacle. The set opened with a Roman empire-style take on her hit "Vogue." She tutted her way through the number and then transitioned to her song "Music," which then segued into a megamix of LMFAO's "Party Rock Anthem" which resulted in Madonna shuffling with the Gordy boys. Amazing.

Madonna then brought out her brown cheerleaders, Nicki Minaj and M.I.A., for a brief run through of her new single "Give Me All Your Luvin'," and M.I.A. might land everybody in a little hot water as she flipped the bird on camera during her verse. As Janet Jackson's nipplegate saga taught us, the FCC doesn't play when it comes to the Super Bowl.

For her final act, Madonna brought out an all-black choir and Cee Lo Green for a divine rendition of her hit song, "Like A Prayer." It was an all-around pop music touchdown. No complaints.

Watch Madonna's Super Bowl halftime performance below

Madonna vs. Lady Gaga: The first blow has been struck

Another idol of Gaga's is coming for her neck. After a few initial friendly encounters, including a chummy joint appearance on SNL, it would appear that Madonna's impression of Lady Gaga has grown sour. The catalyst for this shift in sentiment? Gaga's #1 hit single "Born This Way," which many music fans and critics pegged as an uninspired derivative of Madonna's "Express Yourself."

There was quite a bit of confusion surrounding "Born This Way" and its Madonna influences. First, Gaga took to late night TV to say that the song wasn't similar to "Express Yourself," and that Madonna had emailed her approval of the track regardless. Liz Rosenberg, Madonna's publicist, on the other hand undermined this spin from Gaga, saying she had no knowledge of Madonna ever sending any email of the sort to Gaga.

Things quieted down after that, but the silence on Madonna's part was an omen and in her 20/20 interview, the Queen of Pop struck back like Darth Vader at her upstart.

Madonna is prepping her comeback

Madonna may be in her "golden" years, but she's not laying down and calling it quits anytime soon. Her last studio album and her 11th overall, Hard Candy, was a decidedly urban-flavored affair largely produced by the Neptunes and Timbaland. Given that Madonna's always been somewhat of a chameleon, it's safe to say that whatever she comes up with next, it probably won't sound like Hard Candy.

Madonna's manager Guy Oseary took to Twitter and confirmed that the old queen of pop would soon be back at work on new material shortly.

"Madonna goes into the recording studio next month to begin work on new album. She has a good idea of which producers she will be working with ... lots of questions about what kind of music it will be ... stay tuned"

Good bets would probably be on it still being some form of dance music. This could also be an opportune time for a Lady Gaga collaboration. That is if Madonna hasn't purposely lost her cell phone number after all that huff and puff about Madonna comparisons on the Born This Way album.

Lady Gaga doesn't mind the Madonna comparisons

Ever since Lady Gaga came out with her "Express Yourself"-sounding single, the comparisons to Madonna have run rampant. And at times, Gaga and her team have come off pretty defensive about the whole thing.

But in an interview with Stephen Fry for the Financial Times, Gaga said she is flattered and honored by any of the comparisons to Madonna and she freely admitted that Madonna influenced her latest album, Born This Way.

"[The Madonna comparison] does not annoy me at all. You know what does annoy me? When journalists try to make it look like it annoys me. I genuinely love her so much. I think she is so amazing, she could never be replicated.

She's wonderful and inspiring and liberating. And she certainly inspired my album, as did David Bowie, as did Prince, as did Michael Jackson, as did Grace Jones. So there's my mission statement. If anything, thank you from the bottom of my heart for comparing me to these legendary people."

And there you have it. Gaga has paid sufficient homage and she's cited all of her influences. Can the "Lady Gaga just steals from XYZ artist" complainers have a seat now?

The fact that Gaga is still paying homage to Grace Jones, despite Grace's numerous public attacks on her is also a classy move on Gaga's part. Kill 'em with kindness, as they say.

Madonna is vying for sainthood with Angelina and Beyonce

I'm not sure if one can go from the spawn of Satan to a sanctified holy saint, but Madonna sure is trying. Determined to prove to the world that Oprah Winfrey isn't the only one who can open up a girls' academy in Africa, Madonna put on some local attire (but couldn't ditch the Hollywood shades) and attended the opening ceremony of her girls' academy in Malawi.

Watch the video below.

Parents who send their girls to this academy have no idea, but their daughters will return as pop tarts a la Britney Spears and Lady Gaga. Malawi's about to be the next, great pop tart farm.

Poor man's Angelina

Yes, that would be Madonna. She's trying to adopt Malawian baby #2 in what I hope will be a never-ending adopt-a-thon which will end with an immortal Madonna (she's got the means to fund her immortality) adopting a child a year until all 500,000 Malawian babies have a home. 'Cause she's committed to the children there, right? Show it then, sister.

Madonna wants to adopt a child named Mercy, whose father's whereabouts are unknown and who has a large extended family.

Reuters reports:

Critics had accused the government of giving one of the world's most successful singers special treatment when she adopted her Malawian son David Banda, saying it skirted laws that ban non-residents from adopting children.

Malawi civil society groups say they plan to oppose Mercy's adoption, while aid group ActionAid said the move would not help millions of children living in poverty around the world.

I wonder which trailblazing celebrity will bring attention to the thousands of American children needing to be adopted? I guess we have to wait till that's chic again.

Madonna's brother has a bad case of bitchassness

With siblings like these, who needs enemies? Mind you, I firmly believe Madonna is quite the ruthless, mean, controlling bitch that he paints her out to be, but that's your sister, man! Plus, Michael Ciccione is clearly a sour divo. He's mad cause he's irrelevant and he's hurting for a buck, so he figured he'd cash in by throwing his sister under the bus via a scandalous tell-all book. Check out his appearance on "Good Morning America."

It's weird that he referred to her as a "Catholic" girl. I think Madonna shed any ties to Catholicism way back in the "Like a Prayer" days, so I don't see how that's relevant. Besides, she's a Kabbalahist now. The Pope means nothing to her.

Hollywood Divorce

As we all know, nothing lasts in Hollywood. Not money, not fame and certainly not marriages. The latest brouhaha Hollywood divorce is the A-Rod and Cynthia Rodriguez break-up. Unfortunately, Madonna and Lenny Kravitz have found themselves entangled in this messy web. This CBS clip breaks down the numbers game though for the Rodriguez split. They talk about millions of dollars the way I talk about pennies. Scary.